How to Receive Positive and Critical Feedback with Poise

It may feel uncomfortable receiving feedback on the job. However, effective feedback is a positive thing, regardless of whether it’s critical or praiseworthy. Knowing how others perceive you gives you a basis for progress. When armed with an understanding of what’s expected of you, what you’re doing right, and what you need to do to improve, these interactions will support ongoing advancement.

Here are eight benefits of accepting feedback:

• Learn company-wide expectations
• Feel a sense of engagement and interactivity
• Take ownership of your job
• Help reach your highest level of performance
• Reduce miscommunication
• Build quality relationships and trust
• Become more influential

There are two distinctively separate elements to the feedback ideology. One must learn how to give and receive criticism effectively. While it’s important to dole out constructive assessments, it’s just as vital to understand how to take it in return.

It may seem counterintuitive. However, for your feedback to have the desired influence, you need to consistently listen to the feedback you are given. Whether you’re in management or a team member, being on both sides of the process plays a critical role in a company’s culture. When done well, positive compliments and constructive observations are powerful ways to let someone know that they are valued and appreciated.

Learn more: Know your worth with Glassdoor’s free salary assessment tool.

Learning new ways to receive feedback is a vital part of everyone’s growth process. If you’ve found yourself wondering if you know how to take feedback well, it all starts with these tips:

1. Stay approachable

Most people feel uncomfortable giving feedback, especially if you’re moody or indifferent. Stay open to receiving feedback and maintain a welcoming manner. Keep defensive facial expressions and body language under control.

2. Really listen

Mastering feedback starts with active listening. It demonstrates that you heard the message without judgment.

There are many benefits to listening, including that it:

• Requires you to pay attention and to focus on what you’re hearing.
• Prevents you from tuning out and thinking about your response.
• Reassures the speaker that you understand their communication.
• Demonstrates your commitment to your workplace relationship.

Here is a breakdown of your part:

• Concisely summarize the key messages you heard from the speaker.
• Identify any emotions that are present.
• Reflect your own feedback and emotions with your coworker.

When you commit to active listening, it engages your analytical brain and creates a distance from your emotions, so you avoid the bad habit of jumping in and defending yourself. When you’re focused on deconstructing their communication, you don’t have time to think about a potentially unbecoming response.

3. Acknowledge the speaker’s thoughts

When receiving feedback, it’s vitally important that you thank the person. Whether you agree with the message or not, recognizing their efforts helps build your reputation as someone genuinely interested in your future development—and that of the organization. The last thing you want them to feel is that you’re unreceptive. They may decide to cut off the flow of this valuable information.

If you clearly understand the feedback, thanking them for sharing is the end of the process. If the details include something you disagree with, avoid pointing that out. Pick another time for that interaction when your emotions are under control, and you’ve had some time to mull over the news.

4. Clarify the message

Another method for how to accept feedback positively is to ask follow-up questions. If the communication was unclear or lacked specifics, ask the person if they can clarify with examples. You want to ensure you understand what they think you need to change to be more effective in the future.

For example, your inquiry may sound like, “When you say that I come across as unfriendly, specifically what did I do that caused you to feel that way?”

Another example of a probing question is, “You mentioned I’m having a positive impact in the office. So how can I continue fostering this feeling,?”

Learn More: What to Do When You Get Negative Feedback at Work

5. Take action

If taking action is appropriate, do so. You have the right to decide what to do with someone’s feedback, whether it’s celebrating your success or cleaning up your messes. Check with others, ask for examples, and then decide what you want to do about it, such as:

• If you’ve been called out for being late, set your alarm to go off earlier.
• When your boss congratulates your ideations, feel free to ramp up your creative endeavors.
• Suppose you miss the deadline on a project. Do what it takes to fix it, like staying late.

It’s one thing to know the basic steps to follow when receiving both positive and constructive feedback. It’s quite another to pluck up the courage to actually use these receiving feedback tips. How do you remain poised during a potentially awkward situation? Providing feedback is often uncomfortable and unfamiliar for most people, especially novice managers.

To reap the enormous benefits of developing yourself faster and building stronger relationships, you need to be open to hearing a broad range of people’s perceptions. Many of us misinterpret how others perceive our behavior. Staying open and positive is the best way to learn your strengths and discover areas that need development.

These three points will encourage you to embrace the practice of receiving feedback from others:

1. Feedback is merely someone’s perception

All feedback comes from that person’s perception, and their message says more about them than you. Everyone has preconceived notions that cloud our judgments more than the actual facts of a given situation.

When you’re learning how to receive feedback well, however critical the giver, remind yourself that the information has gone through their filter. Do your best to stay judgment-free when you hear something that you believe is unfair or inaccurate. Consider soliciting feedback from multiple sources and look for common themes that are actionable.

For example, you might reach out to a trusted staff member with something like, “Joe told me that I seemed defensive in today’s meeting. Do you share his opinion?”

2. People already think what they think

Everyone who knows you has already formulated an opinion of you. Dodging feedback doesn’t mean that perceptions aren’t out there. Be brave and allow yourself to hear what people think, so you can choose whether you want to do something about it—or not. When receiving feedback on something you did or didn’t do, your role is to listen and accept that the other person has an opinion. That doesn’t mean you have to agree with it.

3. Don’t feel obligated to act

You don’t have to act on every little tidbit of feedback. What’s essential is allowing your co-workers to feel heard. Building a relationship with someone is achieved by listening without judgment. Your follow-up actions are up to you. If you do take steps to improve the situation, let them know what you decided to do and why.

If you work for a company that doesn’t foster a culture of open communication, how do you learn how to accept feedback? You ask for it, that’s how. Once you’ve mastered the habit, you can then start asking for feedback from more people more often. The best way to start the process is to be direct.

For example, “Can you share a bit of feedback on my performance at the marketing meeting yesterday? I felt like my slideshow presentation hit the mark. What do you think?”

If you want overall development feedback, try “What’s one thing you would like to see me do differently?”

If you get a “you’re doing fine” response, follow up with, “Thank you. So that I can keep growing, what’s one thing I could do more (or less) of?” 

Learn More: How to Ask Your Boss for Feedback (And Actually Get What You Need!)

 

Learning how to receive feedback at work is key to improving your performance and building strong relationships. By following the above tips and tricks, you can improve communication in the workplace, and help give and receive better feedback.

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